First time shooting a 44 magnum, totally a blast!!!
Reloading the Raging Bull Taurus, don't I look happy?
My favorite so far, an old Mauser that from the 1940-ies, the noise, the action so totally fun:)
Monday, October 22, 2007
My Sunday
First time shooting a 44 magnum, totally a blast!!! Reloading the Raging Bull Taurus, don't I look happy? My favorite so far, an old Mauser that from the 1940-ies, the noise, the action so totally fun:)
life is sometimes like those orange beetles, lady bugs that smell and bite *I call them fake...* don't know why they act the way they do, same as I don't know why I'm so sad at times, like this crushing sadness comes over me. Maybe it's fear, because I feel I've got stuff to loose and the harder you wanna hang on the less control you really have. Funny how those things work.
This morning like last night I could hear those lady bugs committing suicide, or attempting to as they crash into the white light. Maybe I was just sad because I didn't wanna leave that sanctuary where the only issues I have to deal with are the suicidal lady bugs and not the maniacs ridding on the highway.
This morning like last night I could hear those lady bugs committing suicide, or attempting to as they crash into the white light. Maybe I was just sad because I didn't wanna leave that sanctuary where the only issues I have to deal with are the suicidal lady bugs and not the maniacs ridding on the highway.
Friday, October 19, 2007
procrastination
yep I'm a procrastinator and I lie once in a while, than immediataly after I lie I feel such remorse that I have to fess up and that's the end of it. So last night after a very fast heart beating and a long conversation with a special someone I finally applied for extension on my green card. Why wait till the last moment? I have no clue but I slept as a baby after this...it only took about an hour of research, deciding paper or electronic and do I wanna spend the extra $370, and than I concentrated and sent it in. Easy as pie.
Now I'm still applying for citizenship in a few days *once again procrastination at hand* but this is one of those just in case things with the extension.... if it takes too long to process application, if I get stuck somewhere in the process, if I get fired from my job and need to prove that I can work here legally *while the citizenship stuff is being worked on* all these things that have been eating me up alive. Because, I know I don't wanna live anywhere else, my family wants me to live here *because there are more life time opportunities here* and well because I love the Midwest.
Procrastination, gives me heartburn, makes me gain weight and I still do it *every day*
Now I'm still applying for citizenship in a few days *once again procrastination at hand* but this is one of those just in case things with the extension.... if it takes too long to process application, if I get stuck somewhere in the process, if I get fired from my job and need to prove that I can work here legally *while the citizenship stuff is being worked on* all these things that have been eating me up alive. Because, I know I don't wanna live anywhere else, my family wants me to live here *because there are more life time opportunities here* and well because I love the Midwest.
Procrastination, gives me heartburn, makes me gain weight and I still do it *every day*
Saturday, October 13, 2007
surrounded by happy people, maybe their happiness will rub of on me. Maybe one of these days I'll be that kid I used to be with no worries and no clouds over my head. Maybe...
satisfaction comes from small things, a message on my cell saying "I can't wait to see you" a glimpse of a smile, laugh over a phone, a silent understanding from my sister as I talk about "my reality". I pretend to be strong, that talking to them is not hard, hearing that dad smoked a few cigs after hearing a song that was "for me" doesn't bother me. I should have no fears, right?
I guess it never gets easy, this life does it? Still I'm happy when we talk, my family seams closer now than it has been in years. One of these days I'll be content with my whole life, I mean it has to happen, it can't all be just work. Can it?
Than again there are those short pockets of happiness, filled with hope and me as I used to be.
satisfaction comes from small things, a message on my cell saying "I can't wait to see you" a glimpse of a smile, laugh over a phone, a silent understanding from my sister as I talk about "my reality". I pretend to be strong, that talking to them is not hard, hearing that dad smoked a few cigs after hearing a song that was "for me" doesn't bother me. I should have no fears, right?
I guess it never gets easy, this life does it? Still I'm happy when we talk, my family seams closer now than it has been in years. One of these days I'll be content with my whole life, I mean it has to happen, it can't all be just work. Can it?
Than again there are those short pockets of happiness, filled with hope and me as I used to be.
Tuesday, October 09, 2007
To quote Jade "life is good"
I can't seam to stop smiling and having a great time. I'm finding old joys, like cooking for somebody other than myself and loving every minute of it. Work sucks but hey one of these days that will change too, I guess I have to have a "stone in my shoe" and I'd rather it's something like my job than my happiness. My weekends turn into mini vacations, that last way too short but are so memorable. Hard to decide what pictures to share when all of them seam like little treasures that keep on piling up. All of the sudden I feel rich though I think this is the lowest my bank account has been in years...
So here is a few of my treasures, hope you like them.
On top of the world:)
The wet lands
I can't seam to stop smiling and having a great time. I'm finding old joys, like cooking for somebody other than myself and loving every minute of it. Work sucks but hey one of these days that will change too, I guess I have to have a "stone in my shoe" and I'd rather it's something like my job than my happiness. My weekends turn into mini vacations, that last way too short but are so memorable. Hard to decide what pictures to share when all of them seam like little treasures that keep on piling up. All of the sudden I feel rich though I think this is the lowest my bank account has been in years...
So here is a few of my treasures, hope you like them.
On top of the world:)
The wet lands
Tuesday, October 02, 2007
N-400
It's a form I got it of this web site called Department of Homeland Security and it's my application for naturalization.
*sigh*
Filled it out on Saturday, been looking it over since then, wondering about where I'll get that $695 for the application...but hey I work I get paid I just can't spend it on anything else but this.
It is a huge step. I've been putting it off for years but it's time I think, I know it is. Maybe because Mom and Dad keep on asking if I've applied and taken care of that "small" business we discuss any time we talk. Now I just need to collect all this stuff needed and it's "only" two pages of instructions of what to send in so that your application doesn't get stuck somewhere.
Wish me luck!
*sigh*
Filled it out on Saturday, been looking it over since then, wondering about where I'll get that $695 for the application...but hey I work I get paid I just can't spend it on anything else but this.
It is a huge step. I've been putting it off for years but it's time I think, I know it is. Maybe because Mom and Dad keep on asking if I've applied and taken care of that "small" business we discuss any time we talk. Now I just need to collect all this stuff needed and it's "only" two pages of instructions of what to send in so that your application doesn't get stuck somewhere.
Wish me luck!
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